To 2024 - I Found What I lost

A new dusk to a new dawn with a new beginning.

 

Year 2 0 2 4 – a combination of number 8, which is considered ‘very lucky’ in Chinese culture, had been a good year for me.  From a twist of event to the previous year 2023, where I lost (another) sister, 2024 started with new resolution.  2 0 2 3 was a year of spiritual awakening and it gave me the insight to make things right.

I wanted 2024 to celebrate life - my life.  I wanted it to be a year where I shared the celebration with those whom I loved and cared.  It was a paying back thing for their love and care towards me.  The truth for me to have lived up to the year 2024 was a feat out from their love.

In January, I found new meaning to what I had previously lost.  The first month, January 2024, brought new meaning to my life.  It was camaraderie of love all over again.  Love, to which I had lost, was found again.  With new meaning, new wealth, new hope of benefiting from an old idea that needed to change.  With the grace from God's love, love continued to grow (in many unexpected ways) throughout 2024.  The magnificent gift came from many new faces, new souls as though God wanted to make things right for me.

The paradigm shift, in the way I nurtured myself to think, made it possible for me to find what I had lost previously.  It had to be the burning desire, deep within my soul, that altered the ways of life.  It had to do with the spiritual love to make things right.  It had to be the repentance - the forgiveness and understanding - I put upon myself.

Love mushroomed in 2024.  Every month in 2024 was lived with renewed vigor.  I met new souls.  I met new love.  I was showered with life.  I was showered with love. 

[I thank God for providing me.  I recognize it.  I realize life has always been good.  It is the way I think that made it seemed to be otherwise.  I guess I had prayed for the wrong reason when the Universe has always been in full abundance.]

2024 was a year I made some losses.  Ironically, at all time, some losses set life free.  Some losses are gains.  It is also true that some losses are irreplaceable.  

For the most things I lost in 2024, some was made with intentional awareness.  It was a personal choice to lose them.  It was necessary for my growth - mentally, emotionally and spiritually.  It was for me to work with the Law of Vacuum to empty what did not work and to replace them with new wishful wants.  Perhaps, the awareness - the repentance, made the difference where those losses were replaced with newly found things.

2024 was a year where I rekindled love with Kuala Lumpur.  It had been a place I had been consciously avoided for many years, out from a deep personal grieving experience.  Spiritually, when I forgive, forgiveness turns into blessings.  Yes, it is important that I forgive - God does and why can't I?  I have to forgive myself for allowing my ego to run my life, for thinking that I am better than others.

To forgive does not necessarily mean to allow things to revert to the ways they were but to let go on those relationships that no longer worked.  Forgiveness is about moving on with the understanding things have changed and to continue to live to respect for each other.  Simply, as the saying goes, keep the best and trash the rest.

In the spirit of forgiveness and letting go, I encountered beautiful things in Kuala Lumpur.  The good feeling made me to return to Kuala Lumpur few times in 2024.  Awareness had a way to refresh life.  She made me to live again.  She made me to love again.  The year ended with most of my grievances mended.  She made me to find what I lost.

I am thankful to be given more opportunities to run into new experiences.  I am grateful that true, kind and sacred love has never left me.  I am appreciative to all the new souls that are providing me with new beginning where I can learn about life all over again.  

At the same time, I am grateful for all other souls who had parted with me.  While our works are done, I am thankful for all the lessons I learned from them.  I vow to think of them with love, always.  My wish is for them to forgive me, to accept my imperfections and all my idiosyncrasies.

Acknowledging these imperfections and the idiosyncrasies is an awareness in itself.  I must not let these energies to compound while not correcting and dismissing the responsibility on them.  To live to be good human, I need to correct them.  I need to take full responsibility on all my actions, thoughts, words and deeds.  I need to make them right so that I become a responsible being.  It is a big task as a living human but I need to take charge to change them.

Thank you, 2024.  Thank you, Kuala Lumpur.

 

 My Wish For 2025

To 2 0 2 5 – a year of spiritual significance, a year of leadership with grandly endeavours, I pray to live in you and with you wisely.  I want to live my life with divine clarity and wisdom, humbly, on a daily basis.  There is, however, the one wish that stays within me, privately.

I love you.  I am sorry.  Please forgive me.  Thank you.  

May the blessings be.  And, it is done!

 

On the side note:

Coincidentally, the beginning of 2025 had been weeks of purging.  It was more than two weeks of recovery.  I was unwell and physically tired - yes, mentally too.  In Louise L Hay's metaphysics explanation (through her book 'You Can Heal Your Life'), I was experiencing the fear of taking my life fully.  

Yes, truth be told and I need to face it to get healed.

PS:  To the loved ones who reached out to me, and prayed for me during those unwell period, my heart goes out to you!  Thank you.

I could not remember, for the life of me, the amount of phlegm / mucus I discharged out from my body (through the cough out of my mouth and sneezing out from the nose) all my living years.  It was alarming and horrific.  Was it a cleansing symbol of me purging the past to enter the new beginning?

Haha, I purged with bad diarrhea and countless vomiting after eating curry fish roe just before Christmas in December 2024 too.  What an irony! - 'Roe' as a mark of new life, new beginning and yet it did not sit well on my body.

God sent me an Angel, in late December '24, to wake me up and guided me to take charge of my life, moving forward.  It was a blessed 2 0 2 4.  Indeed, it was a year where I found most of what I lost.