Do I Hear Or Do I Listen?

While I hear the sound of the words being spoken, I have to pay attention to the words by listening to them.  Hearing is not necessarily listening nor is it necessarily listening well.  There is a lot of difference between hearing and listening.

Listening is about finding out what someone thinks about something.  When I truly listen, I have to put my attention, interest and heart into it and understand what is being said.  It requires me to be patient, receptive, open minded and not to be judgemental.

The greatest problem with communication is I do not listen to understand.  Instead, I listen to reply.  I have to avoid doing that.  I have to listen with curiosity.  I should not put words in other people's mouths, fill in gaps or presume to understand the person fully.

I have to listen for what is behind the words.  And when it is time that I need to say something, I have to speak with honesty.  I have to act with empathy and integrity.  It is important that I show grace and compassion.

The irony to listening to others well is also a contribution for my own well being.  When I am able to listen well, I gift myself with self awareness, self knowledge and self love.  To listen well is as good as being in a state of mindfulness.

When I want to listen, I have to listen with the intent to understand.  I have to listen without forming responses in my mind.  I should have less focused on my own internal dialogue about what I think and how I should reply.  It is hard to listen when I am talking or when I am thinking of a response.

I love you.  I am sorry.  Please forgive me.  Thank you.